Wednesday, November 2, 2011

A sneak peak...

...into my Nano fun. I managed 5924 words yesterday. They just fell onto the page, and some of them even made sense! Nothing brilliant, but kinda fun, ya know.

So here's a sneak peak into the end of chapter one. Set up: Ry bumped into this guy earlier and then he almost runs over her with his motorcycle. Yeah, convenient but its Nano! Anyway, they've just spent about half an hour together and unbeknownst to both of them, Ry is having a weird side effect to being so near a magical creature. Carter is a faerie, but Ry doesn't know. She is however a unique human (no hidden faerie blood I promise) and a bit sensitive to a magic she never believed in. It brings about a strange physical reaction from her. Oh, and Heather is her older sister.
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"Thanks.” Ry tried to sound happier than she felt. “Sorry I messed up your plans. The good news is you just have to get me to the reception hall south of campus."

"Ma Cherie, Let me see you to your car. It's the least I can do."

Ry blushed. “No car. I was planning to take the bus home from there.”

“Then let me take you home. It’s the least I can do.”

Yes. Ry wanted him to stay with her. He felt like the home she never knew she was searching for. Heather shot her a frantic look. Ry grinned back.

"Thanks, Carter." She turned to Heather. "It’ll make me feel better, and I'll be fine. You've seen his face, so if he's a serial killer I'm safe." Ry loved playing on her sister’s fears.

Carter’s deep laughter rumbled in Ry’s ear and the vibrations tickled her toes through her shoes. He pulled out a business card and handed it to Heather.

"Just so you know where to send the police." He winked at Ry.

Heather and Scott didn't look amused, but a strange happiness filled Ry. She watched as Scott read the name on the card and couldn't decide what his expression meant. Shock or awe?

"The Carter Frey?" Scott asked.

"No, just his son." Carter sounded so ordinary. Not the way she imagined the heir to a financial empire to sound.

"The dress. Was that your sister?" Ry’s voice came out in a weak croak. The feel of money at the wedding now made sense.

"Yes."

"I'm so sorry! I really didn't know. I never would have." Her mouth snapped shut and her stomach rolled. The last hour was only his way of avoiding a lawsuit. Nothing more. Ry was a nobody. If she hadn’t stepped in front of his motorcycle, he would never have noticed her.

All the energy from the moment before drained away. Ry wanted to run away, but her feet remained rooted to the floor.

"Ma Cherie, it's not like you’re thinking." Carter reached for her hands.

The electricity was still there. Knowing he was unobtainable had not removed the pull she felt toward him. Ry freed one hand to press her fingertips into her temple. A dull humming filled her head and she couldn't think, but her mouth worked on autopilot.

"I wouldn't, you know. That's not who I am, but then again, I've not really been myself today. Maybe I should…" Ry swayed a bit.

"Let me take you home." He finished for her.

He dropped her hand to stroke her face. In her confusion, she leaned into the touch.

"Did you hit your head when you fell?" His concern filled her heart.

"I don't think so." She mumbled. What was wrong with her lips?

"Heather, we need to get her to a doctor. Just to make sure she's all right."

"Our doctor isn’t open on Saturday." Heather stared at Carter.

“I can take her to our private doctor, if that’s okay with you.”

"No, no, no. I'm fine." Ry swayed again as the hall tilted to the left. Strong arms wrapped around her.

"Ma Cherie, you need a doctor." Carter pleaded.

"Ok, I give in. I feel really weird. Do you know that I'm in love with you?" Ry gasped at the same time Heather did. Then she burst out giggling as Carter Frey, multimillionaire, carried her out the door to a waiting limo. "Did I say that out loud? I'm not in love with you. How could I be? I’m in love with Kevin. No. I can't love you. Our world's never cross."

She rested her face against his neck and commenced sobbing.

Well, what do you think. Did I get the YA vibe going?

6 comments:

  1. I think you would have better luck appealing to the "YA money pinata" if you switched to present tense.

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  2. You did excellent yesterday, and this except is so good. It makes me want to post some, too. lol

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  3. This excerpt is heaps of fun! I would probably change 'commenced' to 'started' but other than that, nothing jarred. Hope nano continues to be as productive for you!

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  4. Good job! And 6000 words? WOW! That's like 24 pages. In one day!! Holy cow!!

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  5. Couldn't even tell it was written during NaNo. :) And I mean that as a good thing.

    I've given you an award: http://brookerbusse.blogspot.com/2011/11/like-polar-express-but-better.html

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  6. Awe, thanks everyone. Day 2 was a bit of a dud, only 400 words. And that was after cutting 300. Yeah, I know, I'll try not to do that again during Nano. But, well, you know. LOL.

    I hope everyone else is having a great writing week as well.

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