Wednesday, May 4, 2016

#IWSG May the 4th Be With You

Purpose: To share and encourage. Writers can express doubts and concerns without fear of appearing foolish or weak. Those who have been through the fire can offer assistance and guidance. It’s a safe haven for insecure writers of all kinds!

Posting: The first Wednesday of every month is officially Insecure Writer’s Support Group day. Post your thoughts on your own blog. Talk about your doubts and the fears you have conquered. Discuss your struggles and triumphs. Offer a word of encouragement for others who are struggling. Visit others in the group and connect with your fellow writer - aim for a dozen new people each time. Be sure to link to this page and display the badge in your post.

Let’s rock the neurotic writing world!  Our Twitter hashtag is #IWSG

First, happy May the 4th day!

Let me tell you I'm wishing for some kind of magic of my own today. Whether it be the force, natural magic like Talia, or wand magic like Harry Potter, I don't really care. Something I could use to get my house clean and enforce the rules about NOT eating in the living room. :)

As for my insecurities...

I'm so sick of being tired and wondering when I'll feel like myself again. Hubby and I have worked our way through almost two years of major life stress. For the most part we've put on the happy face and done our best, but prolonged stress will knock anybody down. On tope of it all, now I've got a 16 year old who has quit school. We pushed her through the GED program at least so she has that. However, now she thinks she can just sit at home and do nothing.

There just isn't anything left emotionally for me to sit down and write. I miss it. At night I dream about sitting and writing and finishing the three stories hiding in the shadows of my mind. Yeah, they're hiding.

Every once in a while I'll catch a glimpse of those characters. When I beg them to come out and play the men won't look me in the eye, and a few of the women might have cried.

My insecurity is more like terror. If I don't get to write soon I'm going to go insane. As it is I feel lost in my own life. It's not a good feeling.

The plan?

First, keep praying for strength.  I know God has a plan for all of us. He's always there to lend his strength when ours has run out. I simply have to keep doing the best I can and trust in Him to make up the difference.

Second, keep walking and running. I had already started, but to make sure I don't quit, I signed up for the Country Music Marathon in April 2017. It will take all year to build up my miles, but I can do it. Right?? If nothing else, maybe I'll finally drop the weight, sleep better, and regain the ability to focus.

Third, find a few days to run away with my hubby. It's been too long since we've done anything relaxing. Even longer since we got away overnight without the kids. Maybe a couple days of not being Mom would help me find myself again. I do have a name after all, and I had dreams and goals before I had children. As much as I love them, they won't always be here and I need to know what comes after they all leave.

So, when you get stressed out do you want to run away? Where would you run to?