Monday, April 26, 2010

Mormon Writer's Blogfest

I’m grateful to Krista V for hosting this special Mormon Writer’s Blogfest. Each participant will be writing about one topic of beliefs of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints. I am lucky enough to get to share with you the topic of Families.

This picture is about 3 years old. I think it is time for a new one.
“The greatest work you will ever do will be within the walls of your own home.” David O. McKay.

This is something that I believe and take very seriously. I share my writing goals with you every week, but today I’m going to share with you my personal goals in relation to my family.

I want my home and my relationship with my husband and children to reflect the love and faith that I have in a loving Heavenly Father and my Savior Jesus Christ. Unfortunately, I’m human and sometimes get impatient, angry, loud, uncompromising. My goal every day is to be a better mother to my children and a better companion to my husband. I want to show these five people, the most important people in my life, how much I love them by speaking more softly and giving them the attention they crave. It is hard work sometimes, and I’m not there yet. I slip and let frustration spill out of my mouth way too often. 

I want to make my family the greatest accomplishment of my life. Even if I manage to write a book that makes it through the publishing process and onto the shelves of bookstores, maybe even become so popular that some amazing director wants to turn it into a movie (hey, dream BIG!), even if that happens, my family will always be the most important thing in my life. So how am I going to do this?

1. I need to understand what it means to be a mother (father, wife, husband, daughter, son, sister, brother, etc).

“Husband and wife have a solemn responsibility to love and care for each other and for their children. “Children are an heritage of the Lord.” Psalm 127:3 Parents have a sacred duty to rear their children in love and righteousness, to provide for their physical and spiritual needs, and to teach them to love and serve one another, observe the commandments of God, and be law-abiding citizens wherever they live. Husbands and wives—mothers and fathers—will be held accountable before God for the discharge of these obligations.” The Family A Proclamation to the World, paragraph 6.

This is why I try and organize my time so that I can write during the time of day that my children need me the least. Writing is my obsession, but my children are my responsibility and top priority. I know that I will be accountable for the effort I put into teaching them what is right.

2. You have to put in the work to make your family successful

“Successful marriages and families are established and maintained on principles of faith, prayer, repentance, forgiveness, respect, love, compassion, work, and wholesome recreational activities.”  Family A Proclamation to the World, paragraph 7.

All of those words are action words. No matter what religion you belong to, it is easier to build a home of harmony when you all share the same faith. We have to be willing to say we are sorry, to forgive each other. There must be respect between spouses if children are to respect parents. It is not enough to feel love, we have to show that love. See, even in our lives showing is better than telling. We can say anything, but our actions will prove the honesty of those words.

3. Understand the partnership involved in Marriage.

“In these sacred responsibilities, fathers and mothers are obligated to help one another as equal partners.” Family A Proclamation to the World, paragraph 7.

Husbands and wives have different talents, strengths and responsibilities, but neither is more important than the other. The IDEAL* situation is one in which parents with differing strengths can work together, relying on the other when help is needed in their weak areas.

I have learned that I must put in the work to keep the relationship with my husband strong in order to provide my children the stability they need. This means making time to date my hubby. Getting away and pretending for an hour or two that he is the only thing of importance in my life, and feeling that in return.

What it comes down to is this. Families are important. They are more than important, they are the best thing in our lives. Have you hugged your children today, kissed your spouse, called your mom?

If you are interested, here are the links to the other topics:

For more information, or answers to questions not covered, you can visit

*I want to clarify that I believe this is the ideal family (man, woman and their offspring conceived and born after marriage), but understand that it is no longer the norm in our society. It is not my intention to offend the choices others make. However, I feel the family is under constant attack and want to be clear where I stand. I do this so my children will know what I believe.

I also believe we are all on this earth to live, learn and grow. Wouldn’t it be nice if we could all be tolerant, loving, and helpful to everyone we come in contact with? There are behaviors I feel are wrong, contrary to God’s plan, but I can still love the person who makes a wrong choice. That is the way our Savior lived. He could not abide the sin, but He loved the individual and taught us the right way. One day I want to live and love others the way He did.


  1. I couldn't have said it better myself, Charity. Thanks for this.

  2. Thanks for sharing this. I love my family. My two-year-old always calls her brother and sister her friends, and that's how I feel about my brothers and sisters. My family members are my best friends.

  3. Great post, Charity. I related to much of what you were saying.


  4. Wonderful post on families and the church. Thank you for sharing your thoughts.

  5. As a wife, mother, AND writer, this post has special meaning for me. It's a tricky balance, for sure (especially when you start having deadlines), but when it comes down to it, my kids need me far more than my publisher does.

  6. I love this Charity! What a great idea. =) Thanks so much for sharing.


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