Thursday, July 21, 2016

Rubbing Glass in the Wound

*sigh* There are things I'd like to keep secret. That's no surprise. Everyone has something they don't want known. Sometimes we have good reasons, like not wanting others to worry. Sometimes it's a pride thing. There are other reasons, but those are the two that I've been dealing with the last few days.

I made a mistake. The prideful part of me is embarrassed. However, I got really lucky and I chose not to tell people because I didn't want them to worry. I know how my close knit church group of family and friends are. I'd have people calling, texting, emailing, dropping in with food and gifts. Then I'd feel guilty because I'm fine.

At least that's what I keep telling myself.

Lucky for me, my friends understand that sometimes the deepest wounds are inside our minds. They have freely loved me and taken care of me for days on end, making sure I don't feel alone since my hubby is currently out of the country. I'm so grateful for every text conversation. Every phone call and meal that was brought to my family in spite of my trying to keep things a secret.

So, this happened last Friday...

You see that miracle bubble around the driver's seat? That's where I was. I admit, when I saw the car for the first time on Tuesday, I was decidedly NOT okay. Not emotionally in any kind of way. Sure, I was still walking around on my own with little more than a few scrapes and bruises, but suddenly the reality of how lucky I had been hit home.

All the "what ifs" that I had managed to relegate to the hours I should have been sleeping slammed into the daylight time. Things could have been so much worse!

What if one or more of my kids had been with me?

That's the biggest one.

So, let me tell you all, that I am doing good. The top of my head is bruised from hitting the roof (I think), my forehead is back to normal although I had a special glass edition of Microderm abrasion, the cuts on my foot are almost healed, the headaches only hit me at night, I can finally take a deep breath without pain, and the only thing that really bugs me is the poison ivy I got walking up the hill to the ambulance.

See, I was able to walk away. Miracles happen!

Here's the glass in the wound part of the post.

1. My hubby bought this car 3 weeks ago. Luckily it is old and was cheap, but now we are back down to 2 cars and 4 drivers.
2. We didn't have collision coverage.
3. I got a ticket for prohibitive driving. (Not sure what that means. I slid around a curve that was still wet from earlier rain. I was only going about 5 over the posted speed limit.)
4. When they did the CT scan to make sure my head really was okay, they found something on my thyroid. We don't know if it's something to worry about or not at this point. It's now on my list of things to get checked out. Along with checking to see if there's anymore glass deep inside my ear. (I got some out, but the one ear still feels weird.)

Anyway, if you believe in prayer, can you keep me in yours that this thyroid thing will be something easy to deal with. Nothing to worry about, and all that jazz. My family has had a hard year and I just don't think we could handle one more thing.

I also want to say thank you to the people I met on Friday. The ones who stood by and talked to me while we waited for the rescuers to arrive and get me out. I didn't catch their names. I'm sure they told me, but I don't remember them now. Those men kept me calm. Kept me talking. Made sure I wasn't alone.

Thank you to EMT Shane for making me laugh even though it hurt. He told me I sparkled in the sunlight (from all the glass and glass powder covering all of me). When I said that might make me a vampire he emphatically replied that REAL VAMPIRES DON'T SPARKLE! I laughed and if I'd felt like moving I would have fist pumped the air with joy to still be in the land of the living.

Thank you to everyone who stopped by my house with some gift to help me feel better, good advice, a listening ear, a hug, dinner, etc. Thank you to everyone who has texted or Facebook messaged me. Your love and support has meant a great deal.