On December 8th post the first 250 words of your finished, or not quite finished, manuscript (any genre) to your blogs. This contest is about voice--whether or not your character's voice matches his or her's age. So if you mention the age or school grade in the first 250 words, please edit it out or block it out for this contest. Don't list the genre or title on your posts.
It is directly related to finishing Nanowrimo, but she states the story doesn't have to be finished. Now, my lovely followers already know my MCs age, but the other participating won't have my Birth of a Novel info, so hopefully I can still get some good feedback.
For those that do know the MCs age, please voice your opinion on if I'm close to the right voice. I really would like to know.
Here are the first 250 words:
“Ryanne Killian, what the hell do you think you’re doing?” Jessie’s shrill voice rose above the chatter in the hall.
I turned to meet her gaze. “What are you moaning about now?”
“I am not going to let you ruin my special day. You have to tell Kevin that you can’t be his best man.” She crossed her arms across her chest. “It’s ridiculous.”
Funny, those were the same words I used when he asked me. I told him a girl couldn’t be best man, but I sure as heck wasn’t going to tell that to miss high and mighty.
“That’s too bad Jessie, ‘cause I already rented a tux.” I turned to walk away, but she grabbed my arm.
“Look, wear whatever you wear to------. -------------------------------------------- . Just smile and don't embarrass us, okay?" Jessie turned and let her nose lead the way as she flounced off with her ----------posse trailing behind. She turned to one of them and said, “Don’t worry, this isn’t over.”
I rolled my eyes and headed the other way. Great, that’s all I needed. If not for Kevin, Jessie would never stoop to speak to someone like me. If not for Kevin, I would have been perfectly happy with that arrangement.
Ah, Kevin. Idiot, jerk, and my best friend since ----------.
Hi Charity, I hopped on the linky (I'm doing the contest too). I really like your 250 words :) I'm thinking your MC is a YA, my guess 17 years? I'm probably way off but hey gotta try! :)
ReplyDeleteSharon
http://showard76.wordpress.com/2011/12/08/can-we-guess-you-characters-age-blogfest-contest/
Mid twenties?
ReplyDeleteSounds like a fun story. I'm guessing the character's age is late twenty
ReplyDeleteDifficult to say. Sometimes she sounds like she's 16 and at other times around 20, so I'll split the difference and say 18.
ReplyDeleteI think she sounds 16. Nice first words. :)
ReplyDeleteSeventeen.
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ReplyDeleteI'm thinking like 24, 25, 26...but because of the wedding. I'm guessing she and the groom are BFF's from way back when and are the same age...that is typical age for a bride and groom. But, the voice does sound a bit younger...more like 19, 20.
ReplyDeleteSounds like a great opening though! I'm really interested in reading what happens! Reminds me a little of My Best Friend's Wedding! Good luck!
Ah, this one is tricky. At first, I'd thought teens (about 16 or 17), but the mention of being a best man (love that she's a girl, though!) makes me think that your M/C must be in her early twenties. No older than about 22 or 23, though.
ReplyDeleteBut I still think she's about 16 or 17.
I'm saying 24, cuz she sounds like my age :)
ReplyDeleteI'm gonna guess the late teens also, by all the flouncing, and the bleeped out references made me think prom-type stuff.
ReplyDeleteNice opening!
18-19? Just young enough to have a posse of mean girls hanging around in the distance, but old enough to be best man in a wedding.
ReplyDeleteI'll admit I was a little confused by the names and pronouns. I had to reread the first few lines. Both Ryanne & Jessie, though usually female, could be male, particularly since you've made the best man a female. I was confused, but hey, maybe it's just me. Keep up the good work.
Good luck! :)
Thanks everyone for the comments. It's been really fun seeing what everyone is guessing, and I admit I was a bit tricky with this one.
ReplyDeleteSeveral of you have hit it on the head, but I'm not saying who. ;) Not yet anyway.
New follower via the blogfest. ^_^
ReplyDeleteHmm...I'd guess she's about 19. Young couple getting married, but still dealing with drama. (Although with some people, this could go on for 20s and older. ;) But I'll go with 19.)
I had the same thought as writeidea. She seems younger than him, but if they've known each other for a long time, it makes more sense that they're the same age, roughly.
ReplyDeleteLogically, I'm thinking early 20's, but the voice is telling me 16-17ish
Very fun beginning. The voice sounds young, but with the wedding going on, I'd have to go with minimum 22.
ReplyDeleteI'm with some of the others--the situation makes me think she's in her early twenties, but the voice sounds more like a 17/18 year old.
ReplyDeleteShe sounds young, maybe about 17.
ReplyDeleteI like this. Nice and bouncy and makes me want to read on. I'd say 17 ish.
ReplyDeleteDenise
Ooh...I like the conflict here with the "girl best man" and bride...GIRL FIGHT! I'm guessing she is maybe 22. She sounds definitely older than a teen but still new at life.
ReplyDeleteSounds 17ish to me.
ReplyDeleteI'm going to go with early 20's. Around 21. Old enough to have history, but young. Interesting premise. I'm guessing this girl best-man is his best friend and there is going to be drama. I like it.
ReplyDeleteI'm sort of torn. If I were to mute the talk about weddings, I'd be SURE this was happening in a high school hallway. Prissy head cheerleader with her clique of cronies, less-popular heroine. But unless this is a social studies project, I'm choosing to believe that high school kids wouldn't be planning a wedding, so I'll go with early college age. (Boy do I want to know what's behind the blanked out lines!)
ReplyDeleteTo help me with her age, I'd suggest grounding the scene more concretely in a specific setting. All I know is that it's a hall filled with chatter. There aren't that many places (that spring to mind) where those sorts of halls abound.
Also, consider starting with something other than dialogue. You immediately told me who was talking, but I still had to backtrack a few words to replay the line in a shrill female tone. Not ideal.
Nice set-up. My Best Friend's Wedding--only with a bride I can love to hate. :) Steal him!!
I think Ryanne and Jessie are clearly female names. But I did switch from female to male back to female due to the best man thing, but I think that's okay. People reading this are going to know if the MC is female or male before. And like I said, Ryanne is def a female name.
ReplyDeleteSo, I'd say early twenties.
And I agree with Robin...STEAL HIM! Love it!
Great job!
Oh, and I'm also not a fan of starting with dialogue. Even if there's just three words of narrative to start us with. :) Not a big deal, though.
ReplyDeleteI'm pegging her to be in her mid-twenties? I'm a little confused as to why you cut out so many words though. Did all of them give away her age?
ReplyDeleteI thought 17 at first, but with the wedding, I'd guess around 23 or 24.
ReplyDeleteI'm dying to tell everyone what's going on. How long do you think we have to wait before we can tell everyone our MCs age?
ReplyDeleteThe good news is most of you are correct on the age, but don't trust yourself because of unique circumstance.
There, that pretty much tells you Ry's age, right?
Jasmine, yes the blanked out words definitely give away their age and raise even more questions. :)
Perhaps 21? Old enough to stand up to Jessie trying to throw her weight around.
ReplyDeleteI get the feeling that she's in university but that's probably just me
she's getting married. I think. So I'd say 27
ReplyDeleteI think your character is 22. Although she is talking about marriage there is something youthful about the exchange.
ReplyDeleteI definitely want to read on :) I would guess 21. Seems like Kevin is getting married way too young.
ReplyDeleteJulia
The dialog is extremely childish. I want to say they are kids play-acting, but the blank scenes lead me to believe they are older... out of school and in their twenties getting married, but the dialog really does sound like kids to me. I'm not sure if this is intentional or not. GOod luck!
ReplyDeleteInteresting scene, makes me want to read on! And I definitely want to find out her age. So...based on comments above, I'll guess 22. However, yes, the voice actually sounds a lot younger. Then again, people in their early 20s can be pretty immature sometimes. ;)
ReplyDeleteI guys older teen or young adult..18-22? Are ranges even what we're allowed to guess? The voice sounds a lot younger, but some of us college students do talk like that.
ReplyDelete*I'd guess older
ReplyDeleteWhat a great idea! Wish I'd seen this Blogfest sooner as I would've been really interested to hear people's opinions on my MCs. As I've seen the full version of this, I know the age so can't guess but I've been fascinated by others' guesses! :-)
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