The Importance of Different Kinds of Beta Readers

Can I tell you how much I LOVE my beta readers and critique partners?

I mean, SERIOUS love here.

I'm sure I've mentioned them before, but if not, just know they rock. Today I'm only highlighting two of them, but there are others just as wonderful. Each one brings a different level of insight to help me improve my stories.

Kathy is my first beta reader. And she is a reader, not a writer. She knows how to get excited about the idea and the potential while still pointing out major character or plot flaws. Do you know how priceless that is!! The balance between building me up, encouraging me, and saying "but this is NOT working over here" is perfect. 

She doesn't write notes in the document I send her. Instead, she calls me up and we have a conversation about what she read. She asks questions and I get the chance to explain what I was aiming for with certain characters or scenes. Then we delve into how I can pull it off better, or discuss alternatives. It's really cool. Kathy is a collaborator as much as a reader. And she's mine! All mine, I tell you! *maniacal laughter*

*cough* 

After Kathy helps me iron out some of the big picture flaws, I move to my other betas and critique partners. 

CD Coffelt (AKA Huntress). She just "gets" me. In fact, we might just be different versions of the same person. I love her stories, she loves my stories. We write at the same level with similar styles. She gets into the document and helps me find the details that I'm missing, as well as some of those pesky punctuation issues that I ignore during drafting. She's a saint for putting up with it actually. 

What I love most about CD's critique style is she will comment on "odd" bits, but she will also mark lines and phrases that she feels are especially well written. I'm trying to emulate her in that aspect. Be positive, highlight the great things as well as point out the areas that need work. 

There are generally a handful of other people that get to read my "pre-publishable" works. My daughter(s), hubby, another best friend or two whose opinions I highly value (Laura, Kara), and then there is my amazing writer's group. We've been sparse in numbers lately, but man has that worked to my advantage! All of these people help give me a perspective on how the story is perceived by different ages, personalities and genders. I know I won't be able to please all of them, and I'm not even going to try, but it's fun to see the variety of thoughts one story can provoke. 

All of these people have helped me tremendously with FADE INTO ME over the last two months. It went from a  49K draft of potential to it's current 58K state. It's not perfect yet, but man has it grown. The characters have come alive. The plot is better developed and streamlined. And the coolest (and perhaps the scariest!) thing? This completely stand alone book developed spin-off potential for one of the secondary characters. 

*headdesk* Like I need another idea at the moment! No worries, I've filed it away until I finish revisions on Search For Knowledge.

Do you have betas and critique partners? Who do you want to shout out to today?

Fading But Still Racing To The End

January 1st I set the goal to finish two WIPs by the end of January--Fade Into Me (FIM) and Search For Knowledge (SFK).

SFK is finished and I'm at the climax of FIM. Today is the last day. Since I'm racing to get some kind of drafted scenes on the page to reach THE END, I'm going to leave you with Charlie and his thoughts on criticism. I especially like the bit about the punch to the face.

Queries are up for Critiquing

Not here of course, but over at Unicorn Bell.

There are 24 queries and many of them are for books I would read right now. I'll be pretty busy trying to make comments on all of them this week. Feel free to come over and check them out. The goal is to make them sparkle in time for the "Final Exam" next week when our fabulous judges come to look them over.

Personal Notes:

• 1 week until the kids are in school and I can get edits on The Magic Wakes finished.
• I've created an author website. You can check it out HERE. Feedback is greatly appreciated.
• I "unfriended" everyone but family on Facebook. It was really hard, but I need to step back and simplify my online life for a while. You can still interact with me on my Facebook Author Page.
• I got sunburned at the beach over the weekend.
• My garage looks like the house threw up in it. Lots of work to do in there...eventually. Hey, I live in the South, I don't need to park in there for a while yet.
• I'm thinking about getting some business cards made. What do you think?

Regrouping and Shifting Gears

Ah, it's good to be back home. Last week was wonderful on so many levels, but the sleeping situation not so much. Just think mice, bugs, damp sleeping bags, and nervous jitters about pulling off another day.

Anyway, I wanted to take a minute or two today to share last week with you and to list what I'm planning to post over the next month or so. This is the easiest way for me to reset my brain from church serving mom to writer once more. Yeah, I know I'll still do both, but the heavy summer activities are over now.

Here are some stats:
7 days of fast paced, hard work

1 Mystery Dinner 50's Style (that I wrote and they enjoyed!) for 40 people (the leaders that came a day earlier than the other girls)
14 meals served
140 girls and leaders
1 Writing Class taught
4 Cooking Classes taught
60 dozen eggs
80 lbs pulled pork
13 lbs elbow noodles turned into mac n cheese
20 gallons of milk
12 gallons of apple juice
6 gallons of orange juice
10 large containers of lemonade mix
More fruit and veggies than I can count
14 hours of dish washing
1 new burn scar on my arm
3 days of thunderstorms--which I loved because it kept the temperatures down
a zillion flies because of the rain--ick!
multiple bug bites
7 trips to town for forgotten items--this is an improvement over last year
2 small bottles of Ibuprofen opened and used up
Smiles and hugs from appreciative girls and staff that made it all worth while
529 posts in my Google Reader--I just deleted because I knew I'd never get through them all
118 emails in Gmail
99 emails in Yahoo

I also learned that communication is key to running a kitchen. We asked my daughter and her friend to cut the bananas for breakfast. At first they were slicing them, with the peel on! Then we corrected them and asked them to cut them in half. Can you see how they interpreted that?! We laughed so hard.

Now, what's in store for me the next few weeks? Tomorrow I'm driving 7 hours to my Mom's for a well deserved vacation with my kids. While there I have three goals.

1. Finish revisions for my editor.
2. Exercise every day.
3. Get totally prepared to pull off an amazing School's In Query Contest over at Unicorn Bell August 13th--31st.

In order for me to do that, I won't be posting here during the 3 weeks of the contest. All my blogging time will be spent at Unicorn Bell. I hope you'll join us over there. The first week is a mini conference of sorts with 3-4 posts every day on how to make your query sparkle. Week two is an intensive critique session for your queries. During week three the queries for completed and revised manuscripts will be posted for our guest judges to comment on and maybe request pages.

After the contest ends, I have a 5 part Story Problems series lined up based on Angela Ackerman's guest post 5 Top Issues I Find When Critiquing.

Q4U: Would you like me to post my notes from the Writing Class I taught?

Exciting things brewing at Unicorn Bell

This is what I posted over there today. If you want to join in the fun, head over there and follow so you can get all the details as they unfold.

We've been sitting on something here at UB.

Well, yeah, that too, but I'm talking about something new for our little blog.

Something we've been dreaming of doing.

Something with YOU in mind.

The time has finally arrived to fill you in on our plan to take over the world!

*cough* *cough*

Sorry, not that plan.

What plan? We aren't plotting to take over the world so just stop already.

Now, where were we?

Oh yes. The plan to help you wonderful followers get some quality feedback on your work.

We are excited to announce the School's In Query Contest!

We are devoting most of August to queries: how to's, examples, workshops and the query process in general. The last week of August we will have three wonderful guest judges reading all polished queries for FINISHED manuscripts.

Krystal Wade from Curiosity Quills
Nancy Bell from MuseItUp Publishing
Amy Lichtenhan SapphireStar Publishing

If they like what they see, they may request pages and who knows where that may lead you?

There will be more info coming over the next few weeks, but we wanted to give you time to comb through that MS one more time. Maybe even get one more beta reader? Here's what these ladies said they are looking for right now.

Krystal--I love older mc's (18+)! I'd like to see some good dystopian, more male
mc's too, and then of course anything scifi/fantasy/paranormal with
something new and unusual.

Nancy--MuseItUp is looking for more dark fiction, horror, as we are light in
that department. However, romance, historical romance, YA/MG from a male
POV that will entice that sector. Of course, we are open to anything
that is well written and crafted. We don't publish literary fiction or
poetry.

Amy--We're especially interested in contemporary romance and paranormal
romance at this time, although we are accepting submissions in all
fiction categories.

If you are interested in playing, what questions do you have about the contest?
Please email them to unicornbellsubmissions@gmail.com and I'll post and answer all of them for our Friday post.

...And for anyone who might be interested, look what I found on Google.

A Picture Paints 1000 Words--Earth Four

Today is the beginning of the blogfest hosted by Unicorn Bell.

Head over there for full rules and Mr. Linky. I'm participating for fun and to get a new short story started. That was the plan anyway, but I didn't get very far. I have a beginning. My biggest problem was the pictures to choose from were all wonderful--that's why I chose them. ;)

Here's the one I settled on over the weekend. Unfortunately, I wasn't home for much of the weekend. Here's my 200 word start. I don't even know if it's enough to hook someone and make it worth finishing the story. What do you think?

Earth Four

The ship’s engines pitched lower as it dropped out of hyper drive and powered up the reverse thrusters. It wouldn’t be long now.

Overhead lights dimmed then brightened signaling a ship wide message. Thousands of people paused mid-stride and waited.

“Attention all passengers, we are now approaching our destination. Earth Four will be within view of the front and starboard viewing halls in thirty minutes time. We will dock and begin debarkation in two hours. Remember, you may carry your own luggage or recycle it. If you choose to recycle, you will be issued a class two mandate for your stay on Earth Four. Gold members will receive an automatic upgrade.

“Thank you for traveling on the Galaxy Gala. It’s been our pleasure to serve you and we hope you enjoy the rest of your vacation.” The voice fell silent.

Tensati hobbled forward once more on his arthritic legs. He had to find Lyria so they could watch the planet come into view together. They had waited a long time to get passage on a cruise liner destined for a young earth. He wanted to enjoy every minute of it with her.

Two hours. 

Two hours until their dreams became a reality.

ABNA Results and Feedback

Congratulations to a few friends who made it to the quarter final rounds:

Theresa Milstein

Hart Johnson

Roland Yeomans

Sharon Bayliss

I did not make it, but it was a relief just knowing one way or the other. After seeing the list I continued to wait for my reviews. When they finally posted I was quite pleased with them. In fact, I thought I'd share them with you.

This is a great model for a critique summary. Remember the sandwich method? You start with something positive, give some helpful and specific things to work on, and then end with something positive. It's also short enough to not be overwhelming.

Things that made me *squee* are marked in Blue.
Things I found particularly helpful to watch for in future writing are marked in Red.

What is the strongest aspect of this excerpt?

The situation and central characters are quickly and clearly presented, creating a sense of urgency and a narrative "hook" that makes the reader want to find out more. The prologue is just what prologues of this type should be: a short glimpse of an event whose connection to the main story is a mystery the reader can wonder about, and (hopefully) eventually be satisfied by. Talia, troubled but determined, becomes sympathetic right away, which draws the reader in. 

There's quite a lot going on in this relatively short opening section, and that's a good thing, and there are also mysteries remaining for the reader to learn more about, which is even better. The elements of science fiction and fantasy are introduced at appropriate intervals so that they feel natural rather than overwhelming the casual reader, and add to the interest in what's going on and what this fictional universe is like. The prose, accessible and fast-paced, further encourages intense reading: it's spare but almost never choppy, which is a difficult balance to strike. If the rest of the book is this involving, I could see reading it in a single, page-turning sitting.

What aspect needs the most work?

The excerpt is very fast-paced, which is mostly a good thing. However, it's so fast-paced and lacking in vivid detail that it doesn't draw the reader in emotionally/viscerally as much as it might. I found myself reading solely for the plot, and while that's nothing to sneeze at, a richer enjoyment is always better. The trick with a book like this is to add a few effective descriptions without losing the pace.

When Jaron is inhaling the demon, for example, the writer might add a couple sentences about ~how~ the burning in nose, throat, and lungs feels-- does it compare to any more ordinary pain (or other sensation) the reader might be familiar with? When it says "he was drowning," how specifically does it compare to drowning? A reader can imagine a few different ways it might be like that, and the more exact the comparison is, the more the reader feels it instead of just reading it.

Talia's nightmare is another important scene that might be improved a bit. She is terrified by these dreams, and for the reader to empathize with that terror the description has to be powerful. If these are prophetic dreams, they can have more sensory detail-- touch, smell, even taste-- than real ones. The Scalies/Draguman are especially important-- if they evoke dread in Talia they should in the reader too, and at the moment they just feel like big lizard-men. Focusing on features that make them imposing or disturbing could correct that, and make this engaging excerpt even more so.

What is your overall opinion of this excerpt?

The excerpt does exactly what an excerpt should do: it makes me curious about what's going to happen next. I got caught up in reading it and was disappointed when I realized I had come to the last page. That pleasure makes up for some limitations when it comes to how real and immediate the experience is. Many science fiction and fantasy readers want to feel transported to a very different place, and it's possible to do that while still keeping those elements "light" for readers who don't know the genre. I think the excerpt works pretty well as it stands; a little work on making the descriptions more intense could push it from good to very good.
____________
 
See, a good and helpful critique can make even rejection feel like a good thing.


And finally, some artwork! My friend Chris brought me another head shot of the dragon. I love the soulful and sad look in the eyes.

Critique Partner Blogfest

Today starts a weeks worth of amazing blogfests. I'll try and keep a running tab of links at the top of each so the different blog participants can find the one they're looking for.

First up is Loralie's Critique Partner blogfest. Follow the link to find the other posts. At first I wasn't going to do this because I don't have a finished novel ready for critiquing. But I will. And that's why I decided to join up. Maybe there will be someone else who needs emails asking, "Hey where's the next few chapter?"

Anyway, here are my answers to some suggested questions from Loralie to help in our search for a critique partner.

Genre: YA contemporary fantasy

Title: Faerie Wings

Current status: 34K rough draft, 2/3 complete. The first chapter has been rewritten and I'm working through the rest before finishing the story. I got a bit off track with my focus and am fixing it.

Feedback needed:  General thoughts. Is the story line smooth and easy to follow. Does the voice match that of a 17-18 year old? Highlight the things you really like, anything that takes you out of the story, questions you have as you read (these help me the most because then I can see if you are asking the right questions in the right places), did I start in the right place (this is debatable even now), is the end satisfying, any unanswered questions that bug you. That kind of thing. I don't need a line edit because what I send will not be the final draft. And probably loaded with passive and -ly words.

The Pitch: 

Everything you’ve ever heard about faeries is a lie.

Lies they told to keep us from learning the truth.

What is the truth?

They live among us, sentenced to watch over and nurture their greatest mistake.

Us.

Ryanne Killian doesn’t believe in faerie tales, and yet all the eyes of the Fae are watching her–hoping she will be the one to set them free.

• The first 500 words: I actually don't have access to my computer at the moment (it's being repaired), and my hubby's computer is so old it won't recognize the external hard drive when I plug it in. So, here is the first 250 words or so that I posted on a webpage (see tab at the top) I created for this idea. (Come back tomorrow for another snippet from this novel for the YAmore blogfest.

“If I do this, you’re going to owe me big time.” I pulled my hair up into a ponytail and stared at Kevin. He stood on my porch in his letterman's jacket looking like the all-American homecoming god without a clue.

“I knew I could count on you, Ry.” He slapped me on the shoulder like one of the guys and headed down the steps.

“I still think it’s stupid. A girl shouldn’t be best man!” I yelled from the door as Kevin reached his car.

“But you’re my best friend. I’ll have Jessie call you. And don’t forget, it’s right after graduation.”

“How could I forget that?” I mumbled and he drove away.

What an idiot. Did he even know I was a girl? I was going to be the laughing stock of our graduating class, but it didn’t really matter. I would do anything he asked. I always had. Look what it got me. Best Man at his wedding. As if that wasn’t bad enough, he was marrying Jessie. The cliche cheer-leading Barbie wanna-be.

Pitch Help Please

January 23rd is the day. Yep. That's the first day you can submit manuscripts for the Amazon Breakthrough Novel Award. I entered last year and didn't make it past the first round, but that's not going to stop me from entering again this year.

However, I thought a little feedback from you might be helpful. Here's what I need to have prepared in order to submit:

(1) the complete version of your manuscript ("Manuscript"); check (almost finished with the seek and destroy mission for the word "felt")
(2) up to the first 5,000 words, but not less than 3,000 words, of your Manuscript, excluding any table of contents, foreword, and acknowledgments ("Excerpt"); check
(3) a pitch of your Manuscript consisting of up to 300 words ("Pitch"); and
(4) the personal information required on the entry form.

I've been working on my Pitch. Do you mind reading it and offering up your thoughts. Be tough because this is the only thing the judges look at to move you to round two.

1. Does it pique your interest? 
2. Should I drop the first paragraph and/or the last paragraph?
3. Do I need to give more or less information?

I can use up to 300 words and this is currently only 237 so there is wiggle room.

The planet Sendek has a rich magical heritage. Unfortunately, the people forgot it when they embraced scientific thought. After thousands of years, they no longer believe in dragons, mages, or the two-legged hybrid they created. These Draguman are returning from exile stronger than ever with only one thought on their minds. Wipe out the humans on Sendek and claim it for their own.

Talia Shannon has kept her dreams of invasion a secret, but she knows they will soon come true. Caught between her job at the Space Exploration Foundation and her magical nature, she struggles to warn her people without revealing her source of information. This task leaves no time for personal relationships, but Landry Sutton isn’t looking for a friend.

As nephew to the King, Landry protects his family from a radical group determined to depose the monarchy. He thinks Talia works for them until a touch sizzles between them, and they discover they can communicate telepathically. It turns out Landry has magical secrets of his own.

As a direct descendant of the mage who created the Draguman, Talia is the key to their destruction—if she can learn to trust the magic coursing through her veins.

The arrival of the invading force makes one thing desperately clear—science cannot save them, and magic is now their only hope.

SENDEK: THE MAGIC WAKES is the stand alone first novel in the science fantasy SENDEK SAGA.