2nd Round Edits are Finished

I'm doing the happy dance.

Wednesday I closed my manuscript document knowing I had vastly improved it over the last two courses of revisions. There are several scenes that I read over and over thinking, "Did I really write that?"

It still amazes me how each revision sends me head over heels in love with the story. After this many years I should be tired of it, but I'm not.

I had a great conversation with my editor as I sent my baby back into her care. My release day is going to get here before I know it and I'm starting to get the jitters about my book. What similarities to other books am I not seeing in my story? It feels good and new to me, but I know everything's been done before. Just because I haven't read it, doesn't mean it isn't out there.

Holy cow, people are going to read this in less than a year! Will they like it?

It's weird to be so close to this dream coming true and yet feel like I'm so far away. I'm still waiting for a specific date. Right now it's a vague "winter 2013", but my publisher did confirm that meant by March. That's only seven months away! There's so much to do it feels overwhelming at times, and yet those are the things I want to be doing. This business really is a funny thing, isn't it?

I want to send a big thank you to my editor Amie McCracken. I thought my critique partners were great helps, but she has really helped me take this story to another level. I wish for this kind of experience for all my writer friends!

Photo used with permission from the European Southern Observatory

The rising of the double suns has great meaning in my novel, and I truly feel like I'm watching them every step of this process.

Regrouping and Shifting Gears

Ah, it's good to be back home. Last week was wonderful on so many levels, but the sleeping situation not so much. Just think mice, bugs, damp sleeping bags, and nervous jitters about pulling off another day.

Anyway, I wanted to take a minute or two today to share last week with you and to list what I'm planning to post over the next month or so. This is the easiest way for me to reset my brain from church serving mom to writer once more. Yeah, I know I'll still do both, but the heavy summer activities are over now.

Here are some stats:
7 days of fast paced, hard work

1 Mystery Dinner 50's Style (that I wrote and they enjoyed!) for 40 people (the leaders that came a day earlier than the other girls)
14 meals served
140 girls and leaders
1 Writing Class taught
4 Cooking Classes taught
60 dozen eggs
80 lbs pulled pork
13 lbs elbow noodles turned into mac n cheese
20 gallons of milk
12 gallons of apple juice
6 gallons of orange juice
10 large containers of lemonade mix
More fruit and veggies than I can count
14 hours of dish washing
1 new burn scar on my arm
3 days of thunderstorms--which I loved because it kept the temperatures down
a zillion flies because of the rain--ick!
multiple bug bites
7 trips to town for forgotten items--this is an improvement over last year
2 small bottles of Ibuprofen opened and used up
Smiles and hugs from appreciative girls and staff that made it all worth while
529 posts in my Google Reader--I just deleted because I knew I'd never get through them all
118 emails in Gmail
99 emails in Yahoo

I also learned that communication is key to running a kitchen. We asked my daughter and her friend to cut the bananas for breakfast. At first they were slicing them, with the peel on! Then we corrected them and asked them to cut them in half. Can you see how they interpreted that?! We laughed so hard.

Now, what's in store for me the next few weeks? Tomorrow I'm driving 7 hours to my Mom's for a well deserved vacation with my kids. While there I have three goals.

1. Finish revisions for my editor.
2. Exercise every day.
3. Get totally prepared to pull off an amazing School's In Query Contest over at Unicorn Bell August 13th--31st.

In order for me to do that, I won't be posting here during the 3 weeks of the contest. All my blogging time will be spent at Unicorn Bell. I hope you'll join us over there. The first week is a mini conference of sorts with 3-4 posts every day on how to make your query sparkle. Week two is an intensive critique session for your queries. During week three the queries for completed and revised manuscripts will be posted for our guest judges to comment on and maybe request pages.

After the contest ends, I have a 5 part Story Problems series lined up based on Angela Ackerman's guest post 5 Top Issues I Find When Critiquing.

Q4U: Would you like me to post my notes from the Writing Class I taught?

Update on The Magic Wakes

I got my new editorial comments on Sunday and it's killing me not to dig in and work on it again. However, I've been making 50s diner booths, writing a mystery dinner game (in the style of those Murder Mystery games), preparing to teach a writing class, preparing to teach a cooking class, pulling pork, quadruple checking my grocery list and baking tons of cinnamon rolls for Girl's Camp next week. My freezer is bursting at the seams and I hope I'm ready.

Funny how knowing you're responsible for feeding 150 people for a week can turn your brain to mush and your nerves to jello. All I can do is hope all my prep work was enough.

But, back to my next round of edits. It's getting so close. There are some easy fixes and some that will require more sucking of marrow from my bones.

I love my editor, Amie. She really knows how to look at the story as a whole and in pieces to ask the hard questions. The lazy side of me groans at trying to figure out the answers, but she's easy to squish (the lazy side of me, not my editor). Mostly I think about how much more depth the answers will bring to my novel.

In the beginning I feared the editing process would kill my love of writing. I read so many accounts of how horrible it was and hard. Some of it IS hard. Luckily, I can see how good it is for me to learn and grow. And the story is BETTER. Every day I get more and more excited that people are going to read it. Knowing this makes it so much easier to put in the time necessary to make sure everything is tied up nicely.

And then...

Oh, yes. By the time I'm wrapping up these edits my kids will go back to school. And then...

*delicious sigh of anticipation*

Then I can rewrite the next book--The Search for Knowledge. 
 ______

In other news, when I get back from camp I have the following books to write reviews for:
Beyonders: Seeds of Rebellion by Brandon Mull (MG fantasy)
No Good Deed by M. P. McDonald (FBI drama?)
Predator Girl by S. B. Roozenboom (YA Paranormal)

Currently reading: Blood Skies by Steven Montano (Said Military Sci Fi, but I'm getting more of a Paranormal Fantasy vibe)

Working with my editor

If you are looking for my "Lightning Flashed" Blogfest entry, you can find it HERE. 

I have to say that working with an editor has been wonderful so far. Two weeks ago I received my first editor's letter. This was a three page general thoughts on Sendek. It contained a section on The Most Important, Things to Address, and Other Things I Noticed. Each section contained questions that came up as she read, concerns, and some of the things I was doing right.

And you know what? Nothing made me cry! I was prepared to cry, but it looks like those years of hard work paid off. Don't get me wrong, there is still quite a bit of polishing to do, but it's all stuff I'm excited about.

Because of this first letter--and the questions, concerns, and suggestions Amie made--I feel that creative buzz again. Ideas are floating around and solidifying into scenes.

Nothing major is changing. However, I have the opportunity to deepen certain aspects of the story, add some more depth to Talia's character and the stakes throughout her journey. The best part is that most of the places where Amie wanted to know more are things that I already knew the answers to. It's all part of the back story I cut at some point in time.

Now I need to find the right way to sprinkle some of it back in. And that's exciting!

The goal is this:

 Not this:

It's also obvious from the page numbers listed in the letter that I combed through the front half of my book more than the latter half.


What tricks do you use to make sure you edit the back half as well as the front half?

In the future I'm going to try the end to beginning method of revision. This way you have to concentrate on each sentence on it's own because you can't get caught up in the story.

Finding Your Story Worth Problem

I got all off schedule this week. Sorry. :) Since I didn't post Wednesday, I'm putting up Friday's post a day early.

I've been reading this book...

Find on Goodreads

I highly recommend it. One of the things that really hit me this first read through is the story worthy problem. In the past I thought about conflict, tension, the problems that come up, etc, but I never thought about the one deep seeded problem that drives the whole story.

It's there in Sendek, but I never named it. And never naming it explains why I still feel like something is missing or not quite working. Let's take a closer look.

Story-worthy problem vs surface problems.

A story-worthy problem always relates more to the inner psychology of the protagonist and has to be big enough, dramatic enough, to change the protagonist's world and force him on a journey of change. Surface problems, on the other hand, are more like bad situations that reflect the actual story-worthy problem, but that aren't sufficient on their own to sustain and entire story. ~Les Edgerton, Chapter 3.

In another spot in the book it mentions how the protagonists thinks they know what the main problem is, but they are almost always wrong--just missing the real thing. Their journey leads them and the reader to the story-worthy problem.

Using those two things, let me give you an example from Sendek.

Talia thinks her problem is that she's going to die a horrible death at the hands of the Draguman if she can't convince someone they exist, are coming, and the people of Sendek need to prepare to fight.

That is a great bit of conflict. It builds tension throughout the story, but in the end it isn't the story-worthy problem.

The deeper psychological issue is that when Talia's family died, she stopped living. Her real problem is learning to live again by letting others into her life. Be willing to hurt again in order to feel love.

But she doesn't recognize that until the very end. In the meantime there are lots of surface problems that move her closer to realizing that story-worthy problem. Her reaction to each surface problem has an effect on whether she is a success or a failure at the story-worthy problem.

Every problem--story-worthy and surface--has its own corresponding resolution or goal, so the resolution of a surface problem shouldn't also be the resolution to the story-worthy problem. Instead, the resolution of the surface problem should contribute to the resolution of the story-worthy problem. ~Les Edgerton, Chapter 3.

Maybe this is all old news to you guys, but this is going to make my current and future WIPs 100 times better. In knowing the difference between the problems I can plan/plot/outline better and keep the end goal straight in my head. Each surface problem can be crafted to better define and guide my character to reaching the ultimate goal.

Finally, Edgerton talks about digging deep to find this story-worthy goal. Deep into our own selves. Let loose your own personal demons and you will find the stuff of greatness. If you are emotional about the problem, it will come through your writing.

That means you have to let yourself out of the box.

First Chapter Joy

For the last few months I've been unhappy with the changes I made to Sendek. We all know how important that first chapter is. It's the make or break point for most readers.

Months of reading blogs and agent sites on what a first chapter should accomplish saw me rewriting and tweaking my first chapter over and over. Another thing that had me tied in knots were the comments from friends and family about how my religion plays into my writing. "How would you feel if (fill in the blank) read your book?"

So I calmed down my kissing scenes. Kissing scenes! Not even sex scenes. I tried to make it all the things everyone else said it should be, until it looked like this...

And to be honest with you, I didn't like it very much. I grew disheartened and put it away. That was the end of October. Part of me was ready to call it quits. I felt like a kid play acting the part of a writer. When I looked at all the things I wrote, all I saw were the flaws.

Taking most of November and December off was the best thing I could do. I kept up a positive face on the blog, but I considered stuffing everything in a drawer and walking away.

I did a lot of thinking.

A lot of questioning.

And you know what? I realized I don't give a flying fig what anyone else thinks of my story or how I tell it. It's my story. Life is not all clean and sterile. It's messy with emotions and bad decisions that we learn from, and it's okay if that's what I want to write about.

Yesterday I sat down and rewrote the first chapter of Sendek. I wrote it the way I see it in my head. I didn't think about the "rules" or anything else that I've ever read or been told.

And I like it.

I feel content again for the first time in months. It's a great feeling.

Want a peak?

Here's the first 500 words of my first chapter of Sendek: The Magic Wakes.

Damn. There was no way out of it. And no way to explain.

At moments like this, Talia wished she had opted for the smaller view screen. President Fielding's gray hair and wrinkle-lined eyes loomed over her on the wall-sized unit. She clenched her hands to keep them from trembling. He had given in to her before. She had to try one more time.

“Sir, I can work remotely from here in my living room. There’s no need for me to move to Joharadin.”

“Miss Shannon, you’ve put this off long enough.” Fielding clasped his hands in front of him and leaned toward her from his desk. “We need you face to face with the Royalists. They can make the moon colony happen, but we have to play by their rules to get it.”

“But if I—”

“If you choose not to come, you can consider your satellite funding at an end. Be on that tram tomorrow. Unless," His eyebrows lifted in hope, "I can convince you to take a transport?”

Talia sighed, “I’ll be on the tram. You know I prefer to stay close to the ground.”

“Very well. I’m meeting you myself, so there’s no backing out. If I have to come all the way to Gneledar to collect you I will not be happy.” He winked and let the ghost of a smile twitch at the corners of his lips. Then he waved his hand and the Space Exploration Foundation’s emblem replaced his image.

Talia collapsed on the couch and rested her head in her hands. Joharadin, capital of Algodova. She had plenty of reasons to stay as far away from there as possible, but there was no way to explain that to Fielding. Sometimes he exuded a grandfatherly attitude towards her, but he was still a man of science. Talk of prophetic dreams would not go over well, especially as an excuse.

“Raise blinds.” Talia spoke the command and the house computer obeyed.

She rose from the couch and leaned against the window. The trees blocked the view of the city, but she knew Gneledar was there. Her home town. The loneliest place on the planet. At least for her.

Generally, she welcomed traveling to other cities for the SEF. The weeks and months in the company of co-workers offered a semblance of a social life not available to her at home. But not Joharadin. Just the thought of the city of her nightmares caused her skin to crawl and her heart to race. A dull ache formed behind her eyes and she rubbed at her temple.

The light from Sendek’s double suns filtered through the trees and into her living room. Flecks of gold danced with the shimmery green across the floor. The movement imitated her nerves. It was already starting.

I’ll dream tonight. Talia sent her thoughts out into the trees and waited for their answer.

We will be here when you do.

I'd ask questions to guide your comments, but after boldly stating that I'm writing for myself now, it doesn't make sense. ;) Feel free to comment anyway. Especially if you've read earlier versions. 

I'm still interested in your thoughts but I'm not rewriting for anyone but me. 

Or an agent. :D 

I can be bought.

Busy Revising

I've been busy revising this week. For those of you who caught me taking a break on twitter, you know how draining its been. The good kind of drain. You know, when you give all you have within you and pour it onto the page so there's nothing left for you when you're done?

By the end of the day, I just collapse. But something's happening to Sendek. I loved it before, but it still felt...I dunno, not there yet. Now there is a confidence shining through that surprises me. I don't know what happened, but I'm moving through the last half as fast as I can before I lose my muse. (I'm slightly terrified the beginning will seem "young" now that brilliance has hit me in chapter 20.)

My Revision Process

I haven't quite recovered from my week of cooking at Girl's Camp, so I'm posting a blog post from January 2010. This is still how I revise my rough drafts.

January 2010
My signature on most forums is some form of the following: "If you are a mother and a writer then you have to make the time to write everyday. Because nobody is going to give it to you. I guarantee it. That means a lot of other things in your life have to go." Once again, thanks to Hoontah for those words of wisdom. (I bet you had no idea how powerfully they would strike me.) Well, I have taken that to heart. Here are some ways I make time.

I keep some pages printed off so I can work on them while cooking.

I also keep a notebook with me in the van and write while I sit in the carpool line. That is a good 15 to 20 minutes every day.

When I sit outside watching my kids play, I either have a notebook or laptop with me, for when inspiration strikes.
Wednesday is the day that my three year old gets to go to his special pre-school class--aka the free "Just For Me" class at the library. It is thirty minutes that I have free to write uninterrupted. Today was a good day. I took one sentence from my draft and turned it into another 400 words. Those words will get revised again at some point, but here ya go!

The draft sentence:

Later that evening, after eating his small dinner, he finally managed to get up to his room.

Became:

By the time he finished spreading the muck onto the field, his muscles ached and the first sun had sunk below the trees. Elvin washed his hands and face in the rain barrel, watching for Della to bring him his dinner. It was never much, but he knew that Della snuck more to him than his step-mother sent. The second sun was slipping below the trees, throwing the clearing into shadows, when the cottage door opened and Della stepped out. She hurried toward him, a breath of color in the grey dusk, hugging a small basket close to her body.

“Elvin? Where are you?” Her whisper was soft and gentle and Elvin realized he was hidden by the shadow of the stable. He stepped out slowly and walked toward the girl.

“Here I am Della.”

Turning in his direction she continued to the wood pile, where they always met for dinner. Della handed the basket to Elvin and then perched on a large tree stump. She was only a year younger than Elvin, who would be fifteen in a few months, and the only reason Elvin had not run away from home. As he took the basket from her, he wished the suns were still up so he could see her better. Her long brown hair blended in with the coming darkness, but in the daylight the coppery shine fascinated him. Her eyes were a soft brown, almost amber, reminding him of honey and sweetness.

“Della, I found something new today.” Elvin removed the cloth from the basket and found half a boiled potato, a small piece of venison, and a soft roll. He knew that Della had eaten his hard roll and replaced it with her soft one. A lump threatened to close his throat, but he ignored it.

“What? When can I see it?” She clasped her hands together and leaned toward him.

“It is a secret for now, but I will show it to you soon. First I have to find a way to bring it down the mountain.” The hunger gnawed at him, and as his stomach grumbled in anticipation, Elvin bit into the meat. His step-mother might be stingy, but the juicy meat was a testimony of her cooking skills.

“Is it so big?” Her eyes grew wide.

“No,” Elvin quickly swallowed the last bite of meat. “but it is in a crevice and I can not carry it and climb back out.” He started on the potato.

“Wait here!” Jumping up, Della ran back to the cottage and disappeared inside. While she was gone, Elvin ate his roll slowly, savoring each bite of Della’s kindness.

Why am I posting this? Even though it still needs work, I wanted to show my process. The first sentence is 100% telling, and not very informative telling at that. My current draft is almost more of an outline than writing. Now that the plot is all down, I need to flesh it out. Build some characters, setting and emotional depth. This scene is FAR from being complete or even close to where I want it, but I find that I do better when I work in small chunks. (I'll hopefully finish the scene tonight when the kids are in bed.)

I wish I had at least four hours a day to hide in an office with a closed door to write, but I don't. 

Why did I decid to elaborate on that first sentence? I want my readers to get to know Elvin, where he lives, what life is like for him, how he sees things, what he feels in his situation, etc. So, let's look at him in an every day situation--eating dinner. The scene is closer to showing you that he is not allowed inside the house than the original sentence (still needs work, I know, and the rest of the scene will make it clearer). Later, we will go to his room, the loft above the stable, and take a look at his meager belongings--giving yet more insight to his life.

The point is I am trying to show you what his life is like without telling you that his step mother hates him, his father ignores him, he is a hired hand not a son, he loves Della because she is the only one kind to him. I could tell you all those things and make a decent story out of it, but if I work a little harder to pull you into Elvin's world, make you feel what he feels, then you will begin to care what happens to him.

The other reason I shared today's work? One revision of your draft is not going to make your novel ready for the publisher. Plain and simple.